Do you avoid getting too close to people because you fear losing them? If so, you are not alone with this, and a fear of loss is actually fairly common. However, if it is stopping you from having a rich and abundant personal life, and stopping you from taking steps in life, such as getting married or having children, then it may be time to consider your fear of loss and look at how, if a loss did happen to you, you could proactively cope with it.
A fear of loss can arise when you have experienced a loss already, or it can be something that happens when you come close to losing somebody.
Sometimes a person can have a fear of loss and not have any idea where it came from – but more often than not, if we sit back and think about it, we can pinpoint a cause fairly easily.
Look at the loss you have experienced in life and identify if your fear is linked to that.
Look back at all of the times that you have experienced loss in your life and ask yourself, if one of those losses in particular could be responsible for your present day fear.
if so, maybe you need to do some work on grieving that past loss – you could write a letter to the person, they may be deceased or alive, (as loss isn’t exclusively about dying). Write a letter then set it free – maybe burn it (safely) and make your peace with how you have been feeling.
Often we repress feelings after losing someone, because we go into self-defense mode, but this only buries the feelings deeper.
Address what it is that you fear – in regards to losing somebody.
Of course this sounds daft in a way, as nobody wants to lose somebody and to some extent, we all fear it, especially if we love them. But underneath the fear of losing someone can be other fears that run deeper, things such as:
- Fear of being alone
- Fear of never finding love again
- Fear of grieving.
If you can break down the fear, and look at things subconsciously, then we can work on that fear much more deeply and also work on being happy in your own company. We come into this world alone, and we leave this world alone. Being happy in your own company is incredibly powerful.
Get a better understanding of dealing with grief if loss does happen.
One thing that we can all be sure of is that we going to die in this lifetime. That means that at some point, whether it be a parent, a partner, a pet, a friend or a child – chances are, we are going to experience losing someone that is dear to us.
More often than not, we handle grief by looking at ‘getting over it’. But when we change our perception to ‘expanding our life around it’ life opens up for us. You never need to forget someone that you have cared about, nor do you have to remove all traces of them from your living space. Embrace their presence, even if it isn’t physical, and allow them to exist in your life, in your heart, and in your memory.
it can be so painful to feel like you cannot let go, cannot move on – yet we never really do let go of people – we just carry them with us. So think of ways that you can include their memory in your life, look at the positive life lessons that you can learn from them and be grateful for the time that you got to spend with them.
Let their be a lesson in every meeting and every goodbye – loss is a part of life, so celebrate that persons presence rather than shrink away because of the loss of it. They wouldn’t want that for you.
I hope that this article helps you somehow, and know, that if a fear of loss is stopping you from being happy in life, then book a clarity call with me to discuss how i can set you free from your fear. Book your free call here.
ENJOY YOUR WEEK 🙂
And remember with what is going on in the world right now, any worry or fear is normal. But what matters is that you don’t let it get hold of you.