It’s Mother Day tomorrow and our social media feeds will be streaming with photos and well wishes for Mothers, but for some of us, it can be a day where we want to hide back under the duvet covers. How can you handle loss this Mothers Day and not only survive the day, but enjoy it? Keep reading…
Acknowledge The Loss And Speak About The Sadness
It can be difficult I know, but you’d be amazed how many people try to get through the day and almost do their best to not acknowledge it. This only makes things harder – acknowledge the loss of your Mother, speak about the sadness (if you don’t want to talk to another human it can be in a journal) and just acknowledge your feelings Don’t turn your grief into an elephant in the room, make space for your sadness.
Celebrate The Day And Look Back At The Memories
We still have a Mother, in a different realm yes, but we still have the right to celebrate the life of our Mother on Mothers Day even if she is no longer with us in physical presence. Take time to celebrate your Mother, maybe buy some flowers and plan to go on a walk and leave one flower on a door step, one on a bench… spread some love and happiness, imagine doing this with Mum by your side, and turn the day into a day when you can give something to others, as you never know who else might be struggling and your act of kindness could brighten a darker day for them.
Be Kind To Yourself And Allow Yourself To Feel Your Emotions
It can be so easy to say Oh I am fine, and try to distract yourself, maybe with a quick trip to the pub and alcohol. Let yourself feel your emotions, write them down, call someone that you feel you can speak to. Sit and speak to yourself in a room, speak to a photo of your Mother, it really doesn’t have to be logical, just allow the feelings to come to the surface and express them, and be kind to yourself – get in some nice healthy food, things to keep yourself active and feeling as positive as you can – movies, go for a walk, plan your day so that you don’t find yourself at a loss with it.
However, know, that if you DO just find yourself wanting to stay in bed all day, if that is how you need to deal with it, then do that. Just let yourself feel whatever you feel.
Quick Havening Technique For Anyone Grieving
Close your eyes, take a deep breath in and think about what it is that is upsetting you. Let yourself really connect with it and feel it, and then cross your arms, and place the palms of your hands on your arms. As you think about the thing that upsets you, gently rub your arms up and down, breathing in and out, releasing your grief with each breath. When you feel your system come back to a place of balance, take one final deep breath in and out again and then put your arms back down by your side, stand tall, allow the energy to settle and relax.
As always if I can help you deal with anything then please do book your free clarity call with me, we can talk about things and see if I can help you work through them in a one to one session. Book your free call here.
I hope that you have a lovely weekend and enjoy it as best as you can
Christopher Paul Jones.